Unity ARP

Encouraging Younger Men

Titus 2:6-8

9/12/99

“Real Men Love Jesus”, goes the bumper sticker. What I want to know is do real men put bumper stickers like that on their trucks? I don’t think so. What about the guy who has a bumper sticker that says, “Protected by Smith & Wesson” - is he a real man? I doubt it. What is a real man anyway? Over the last decade we have witnessed a plethora of “men’s movements,” each an attempt to recover biblical manhood. However, often these movements have only addressed the symptoms of a deeper problem. What is the real problem? Why don’t we have more real men?

George Grant has insightfully written that much of the teaching on manhood today is based on a false assumption. He said: “It is that true masculinity can be had apart from disciplined maturity and diligent labor. The contemporary demise of manly virtue is . rooted in the infant-il-iz-ation of the faith. It is rooted in the dumbing-down and the easing-up of the demands of the Gospel. It is rooted in the over-simplification and the under-estimation of discipleship. It is rooted in an aversion to work, perseverance, and holy patience. It is rooted in a revolt against maturity. Maturity is the essence of manliness.”

I want to ask a question this morning - How can young men become real men? Men of God? Young men and men of any age will become real men when they live in such a way, as verse 8 says, “That one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say about you.” Real men are those who will not back down from a fight. As Christians, we fight against real opponents of the gospel. The way in which we fight them is with the truth of God’s word, and the holiness of our profession. In short, God is calling men to live in such a way that they shame the opponents of the gospel. Is your life putting to shame the opponents of Christianity, or is your life a shame to the faith?

In 1 Peter 2:11-12, Peter similarly admonished the believers to “abstain from the passions of the flesh that wage war against your soul. Maintain good conduct among the Gentiles, so that in case they speak against you as wrongdoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.” Wicked men will say bad things about you if you are living a godly life. When Paul says that the opponents would have “nothing evil to say about you”, he didn’t mean that they wouldn’t say evil things about you, but that they in fact would have no basis for something evil to say. They may make something up, but you are not to give them any real dirt.

So then, just how are you to live so as to shame the opponents of Christ? First of all,

I. MEN, YOU MUST BE SOBER-MINDED

It is the tendency of boys and young men to want to play games. Many boys today grow up playing sports and video games without ever having been given any real responsibility or work to do. Consequently, when these boys grow up and get married, they are not quite ready for responsibility, and they are not ready to give up their games. I know one guy I used to play softball with who told his wife he would marry her only if she promised to never interfere with his playing softball. At the time he played about 300 games a year. For others it is hunting, fishing, or golf that comes first. You fill in the blank. Wives and children are neglected so that “boys” can still play with their toys.

The neglect of wives and children is only a symptom of the problem, however. The problem is that they are not sober-minded, they do not take life seriously. What does it mean to be “sober-minded”? It can also be translated “sensible or self-controlled”. It means to “think of one’s self soberly.” In Romans 12:3 Paul said, “I say, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly.” In other words, stop being so cocky. You are not as great as you think you are. Sober up in your self-assessment. Watch out for pride. Matthew Henry said, “for there are more young people ruined by pride than by any other sin.”

This word “sober-minded” also means “to curb one’s passions”. It is the idea of exercising self-restraint. Youth tend to throw off self-restraint. Two areas in particular that young men tend to throw off restraint are with sexuality and authority. Guys must discipline themselves and control their passions and thoughts, lest they enter into sinful lust. Younger men also tend to be impatient with established authority. They need to learn to respect their fathers, their elders and all those in authority, as the Bible teaches.

Young men need to be “exhorted” or “encouraged” to learn self-control. While older women were to train the younger women, Paul gave Titus the task of encouraging the young men. Titus himself was in that same category of “younger men.” Paul told him to come along side them, as an example and encourage them. He was to be a player-coach. Dr. Adams said, “Encouragement is not the same as demanding. It involves a reasoned approach that is careful at all times not to err in the direction of scolding and censoriousness. It is the approach not of the schoolmarm who demands compliance to her every whim, but rather, the approach of the football coach who, with his arm around the player says, ‘OK, now let’s get in there and do the job - I know you can!”

Parents, especially you fathers, if ALL you are doing is demanding and scolding, and there is no encouragement to your boys, or girls for that matter, then you will repel them. Ephesians 6:4 in the Amplified New Testament says, “Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger - do not exasperate them to resentment - but rear them (tenderly) in the training and discipline the counsel and admonition of the Lord.” As a man, I naturally want my boys to become men. I want them to be tough, so I am tough on them. But if I am tough without tenderness, then my boys will only hate me and perhaps the God I profess. Instead of provoking them to anger, you and I must affectionately and encouragingly disciple them.

I’m not saying that you are not to command obedience and respect. I’m not saying you don’t need to get the rod out and spank them - you should. But that must be coupled with tenderness and encouragement. Dr. Adams says, “You will usually discover that the problems you encounter in the discipline of children may be accounted for by a failure to be strict enough while emphasizing tenderness, or not tender enough while emphasizing strictness.” Your goal in all of this is that they become mature, sober-minded men of God. Boys, if you and the men in this church develop this quality, then you will shame the enemy and be victorious as soldier in the army of the Lord.

But not only must you be sober-minded, but in order to put the enemy to shame,

II. MEN, YOU MUST COPY A PATTERN OF GOOD WORKS

In verse 7 Paul is telling Titus how to live in order to be an example to these younger men. His example is to be the pattern that you and I copy. Titus was to show a “pattern of good works” so that you would also practice good works. The entire book of Titus is devoted to sound doctrine that produces good works. Titus 3:8 says, “This is a faithful saying, and these things I want you to affirm constantly, that those who have believed in God, should be careful to maintain good works.” Paul constantly affirmed good works in this letter. Who should perform good works? Those who have “believed in God”, he says. Be sure that you have trusted in Christ as your Savior. Be sure that you have genuine saving faith, or else all your works will only be polished wickedness.

If you know the Lord and are assured of your salvation, then do good works. In Ephesians 2:10 Paul said, “For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” A work or deed that is good is one that is “excellent, useful, commendable, admirable, praiseworthy, noble and honorable.” These deeds are not merely superficial acts that only appear good. How do you know when a deed qualifies as a good deed in the sight of God? They are good deeds when they are done in obedience to God’s command and His definition of what is good. They are good when they come from a good heart that has been purified by the Holy Spirit. They are good when they are done out of faith in Christ. A work is a true good work when it builds up others in the faith. And works are good only when they are done in the name of the Lord Jesus for the glory of God. God calls you and me as men to do such works that will stand on the Day of Judgment. That great day will reveal the secrets of all hearts, and the truth in regard to what every man has done. That event will show what works were built on the true foundation of Jesus Christ and His glory, and which were done for our own glory. 1 Corinthians 3:13-15 says, “each one’s work shall be revealed. For the Day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try each one’s work as to what kind it is. If anyone’s work which he built remains, he shall receive a reward. If anyone’s work shall be burned up, he shall suffer loss. But he shall be saved, yet so as by fire.” How great it will be for you to come before God on that final day having done many deeds that are good and that truly honor the Lord!

We have seen that in order to put the opponents of the gospel to shame, you must be sober-minded and you must follow a pattern of good works. But also:

III. MEN, YOU MUST DEVELOP THEOLOGICAL INTEGRITY

Paul never tires of emphasizing doctrine. Here he speaks about “doctrinal integrity.” What does he mean by this? To have doctrinal integrity is to be completely true to what is taught in the Scriptures. It is the opposite of that which is based upon speculation or the traditions of men. As a pastor, I have taken vows to uphold the Bible as the infallible word of God, promising to add nothing to it or take anything away from it. I have also promised to adhere to the doctrines taught in the Westminster Confession of Faith and Catechisms. If I begin to teach things that are not in Scripture or that contradict it, then at that point I have departed from theological integrity.

If in teaching the Bible I take passages out of context and use them for purposes other than what God intended, then I have abandoned doctrinal integrity. The overall purpose of all doctrine is that it would lead to practice. Specifically, doctrine should lead you to love God with all your being and to love your neighbor as yourself. So if your doctrine is off, then your practice will miss the mark as well. There are those who say that theology doesn’t matter. That is an outright lie. The way you talk, live, and die will be an outworking of your belief system. Christians must seek to hold the truth with integrity and even be willing to confront error. Martin Luther’s response when told to forsake his theological integrity should be our own: “Unless convinced by Scripture—-here I stand, I can do no other.” That’s integrity. You have convictions, you live by them and you are willing to die for them, without compromise, no matter what man may do to you. That’s the kind of men that are needed in the church. Are you that kind of man? If so, you will help shame the opponents of Christ.

Next, in order to put the opponents of the gospel to shame:

IV. MEN, YOU MUST HAVE A REVERENT ATTITUDE

This word denotes gravity, respect or dignity. Young men need to develop a seriousness of life that fits together with the seriousness of the faith they profess. I remember when I first came to Unity. There were several women who routinely exhorted me to “lighten up”. Rather than lighten up, the Bible says men ought to get serious about their faith. The Puritan Richard Baxter, in his book The Reformed Pastor said, “Of all the forms of preaching that I most dislike, I hate that which tickles the audience with many jokes and entertains them with superficial amusement. It is as if they were in a theatrical performance, instead of being awed by the holy reverence of God’s character.”

You know that two of the great preachers of the past differ on this issue of the use of humor in preaching. C.H. Spurgeon thought it was perfectly fine to be humorous in the pulpit, but Dr. Martin Lloyd Jones did not agree. Martin Lloyd Jones said, “I confess freely, I cannot understand a jocular evangelist. god back and read the lives of the men whom God has used in the mightiest manner, and you will invariably find that they were serious men, sober men, men with the fear of the Lord in them.” Of course there is a time and a place for everything. The Bible says that there is a “time to weep and a time to laugh.” I don’t think humor is always out of place in a sermon, but too much of it takes away from the seriousness of what is at hand.

One thing that will help you to be more reverent is to realize that all of life is lived Corem Deo - before the face of God. Those that are conscious of the presence of God in daily life will be more able to honor Him with a reverent attitude. I remember as a child being told to be reverent in the church building because it was the house of God. It is a good thing to teach our children to be reverent in church, not because the building is God’s house, but because the real church - the people of God have gathered in the presence of God to worship Him.

The Christian faith has to do with the weightiest matter in life - the eternal destiny of living souls. To be light and trivial all the time, whether you are preaching a sermon or witnessing over lunch, does not comport with the seriousness of your calling as a Christian. Listen again to Richard Baxter: “Speak not one cold or careless word about either heaven or hell. Whatever you do, let people see you in earnest. For you cannot break up people’s hearts by jesting with them or by telling them jokes. Speak to people as though their very lives were at stake.”

In verse 8, Paul closes out this list of things that Titus must exemplify for young men. In order to put the opponents of the gospel to shame:

V. MEN, YOU MUST HAVE SOUND SPEECH THAT CANNOT BE CONDEMNED

The word “sound” is the same word used in verse one and has the basic meaning of “being well, healthy and whole.” Paul is probably referring here to ordinary conversation and everyday speech. Men, how is your language? Do you need to clean it up a bit? Is it healthy, wholesome? Paul says that you and I are to have speech that cannot be condemned. Our everyday talk must be above reproach. There are some Christian men who feel that they still must curse in order to be a man. Some preachers I know cuss frequently and it is rather unbecoming. But it is unbecoming to any Christian to speak this way.

Men, can you tame your tongue? James said, “No man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.” Again, I ask, can you tame your tongue? It is worse than a wild beast. It bursts out vain, idle, angry, and sinful words - whether it be lying or swearing. But God, by his Spirit, power, and grace, can, and often does, change the curser, the swearer, the liar, and blasphemer. God can tame the tongue, but no man can do it by himself. James goes on to say in chapter three, “Out of the same mouth proceed blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be so.” “Like Jesus, James sees a person’s speech as a barometer of his spirituality; it reveals what is in the heart.”

Do you think that your speech is unimportant? Listen to what Jesus said in Matthew 12:36-37: “I tell you, on the day of judgment men will render account for every careless word they utter; for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” How do you tame the tongue so as to have sound speech? By putting off the old ways of speaking and renewing your mind with the sound words of Scripture. Romans 12:2 says, “be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Your tongue will be transformed when your mind is renewed. The Holy Spirit works with the Word and brings about the change.

Is your speech beyond reproach - that which cannot be condemned? Sound speech, along with the other virtues that we have looked at today, is surely one of the marks of a man who is growing in holiness. Such a man will shame the opponents of the gospel because they will have nothing bad to say about him. The holy lives of the younger men in this church, coupled with a readiness to share the gospel is all the church growth methodology we need. A holy life is a most powerful tool in the hands of God to shame unbelievers and make them pay attention to the Word of salvation that we preach.

Christianity has a lot of critics today. Many of them are critical because they have seen far too much hypocrisy among professing Christians. The way to deal with such people is to live a life that is genuine. Be an authentic Christian man. Be a real man - a real man of God.

This entry was posted on Sunday, September 12th, 1999 at 10:35 am and is filed under Series on Titus, Sermon Text.